I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. But the rise of the chest was quite perceptible now. She sat in a chair in the parlour and regarded the darkening sky through the small casement window. You are your own Heaven and your own Hell, Lucy. Over here, there was generally some unusual twist to a case. The skipper, Van Galgebrok, affirmed to me,—nay, gave me the additional testimony of two of his crew,—that he was thrown overboard. ‘Will you—what was it?—“blow off his head”?’ Melusine eyed her, a little uncertain. A thousand dollars is a lot of money for an author to earn. It is not for myself I fear. But I never found any truth in the saying. It was common name, so I was thrown off the scent. ‘I just don’t understand you, Gerald. We're lost.
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